And We're Off!

And We're Off

I had decided all along that I needed my mum to be at the birth as well as Jamie, the reason for this, other than she is amazing support and my best friend - someone had to look after Jamie while I went through labor! No, I am not a single mum with a child named Jamie, he is my fiance, my very annoying fiance!

We arrive and are introduced to a lovely student midwife. There is a bed with what I can only describe as a puppy pad on it, also in the room was a gym ball, a fridge, a dog bowl, coffee, tea, water etc and a radio. Party time!

Unfortunately the fridge was empty and not containing any party essentials! 

Student midwife returns to time my contractions.

Me - "I think I am having one"

SM- "You think?"

Me - "Mmm....yeah it is one..........It's gone now"

SM - "You dealt with that well, you must have a high pain threshold."

Great I thought, this shouldn't be too bad then. The next thing I can hear another lady screaming in labor. I remember thinking I hope I don't scream or anything, I don't like drawing attention to myself! (Little did I know......)!

Two hours passes and they are going to break my waters. Out comes a hook (where do they think they are putting that!!!) to break them and it's a very strange feeling! Then the fun began! 

Mum - "Use the gas and air, it will help". 

Me - "No it makes me feel funny I don't like it"

At this point I was in A LOT of pain! Still wasn't taking the gas and air but did ask the SM for some pain relief. She couldn't administer it as she wasn't qualified, so she went on the hunt for the midwife to do so. 

Over an hour and a half later and still no pain relief. Turns out I was too far along to have any, I thought begging would help, it didn't! So I finally got persuaded to use the gas and air. WOW!

It was like everything was at a distance and my head was about to float away. I soon got the hang of it and it was my new best friend. 

My new best friend turned into an enemy sometimes. At one point I bit it so hard I managed to pull it apart, then it hit me in the nose, then it hit me in the eye. My new best friend had clearly moved my mouth from its original place on my face because I couldn't bloody find it anymore! It wasn't helping with the pain very well either! Why didn't it like me anymore!

New position acquired - the birthing stool. Now I knew why there was a dog bowl in the room, it was to catch my dignity as I looked like I was sat on a toilet with a room of people watching me, telling me to stop screaming (NO).

MW - "Soon I want you to pant during the pushing and in a few more contractions we will have a baby!" 

*A few more, please no, please tell me you mean a couple more*.

Me - "I want to go home now, please can I go home!"

MW - "No you can't go home you are having a baby".

The babies head was only just visible. About the size of a 2p piece visible.

So the panting never got chance to begin, another feeling to push arrived, the next thing I flew back into Jamie who was supporting me and everyone was suddenly saying things like "Oh my god!" "Wow!" 

I had no idea what happened, was something wrong! 

Nope, I had fired my baby out all in one! Into the dog bowl! The midwife managed to catch her by her leg so she only half landed in the dog bowl!

Well that was an experience!